Sunday, December 7, 2014

What even is this post?

I think I'm just blogging through the stress right now. I have no clue where this post is headed but MY GOODNESS I needed somewhere to just write everything right now. This is not a research paper or an essay or anything of the sorts, IT'S MY BLOG AND I'M SO HAPPY ABOUT THAT. All my own. No one's grading me on it (I hope) and I know I've been sucking at my favorite thing in the world. 

At the moment, I'm sitting in the library trying to not have a panic attack about my upcoming exams, but relishing in the fact that I will be home in one week. What is home anymore? Is home Lexington, where I lived for over 18 years, or is home the University of Richmond where I started over my life with all new friends and people and where I'm living? It's a weird concept to have and I definitely felt it over Thanksgiving last week when I got to go to Lexington for the first time since leaving for school. 

Going home was weird because in a way, it felt like nothing had changed. Nothing had flip flopped and everything just went back smoothly the way it was supposed to, and ya know, all the plates were still in the same place and I still had my drawer for granola bars (I didn't have a cup for my toothbrush. That was it.), so it made it even weirder. Lots of things about me seemed different, just because I had spent three months living away from everyone else. That's the weirdest thing about going to college far away- I dropped literally everything and everyone in my life and moved 8 hours away to start over. It's a silly thing, but I think about how I had no toiletries when I moved in and had to start from scratch. That's the way everything else was. And now, all the sudden, I was home where I hadn't been in months and it wasn't my real life. 

Home was also an odd feeling because laying in my bed, everything that had happened in that room came flooding back. That room was where every emotion under the sun occurred, from mental breakdowns to times of uncontrollable joy to crying sessions to anxiety and more. I loved home and loved everything about my life before I left for college, but I spent so much of that time waiting for when I finally could get out and live on my own. I grew out of that house long before I could actually leave and though I love all of it with all my heart, my life is now somewhere else with different people. 

And just like that after a few days, I was back at school and everything was flowing normally. But now I'll be home in a few days again and it's so strange. To be home for a month without everyone here? Oh well, I guess every single college student deals with this every year. I don't even know what I'm saying anymore. 

And yeah, sorry I don't have a bunch of cute little gift guides and posts about the holidays. I really suck at those and getting in the holiday spirit more than a week before Christmas. Ehhh, I take that back, I am in the Christmas spirit, but being excited about very much when I have so much to do is annoying. (Thus, I'm blogging instead. Gotta pick my game back up.) I guess I'll do my normal self and dump a bunch of photos on ya.

Some of my new goodies from Rocksbox!

My sweet grandmother sent me the pillow on the right for my birthday and I love it! My mom had made me a seersucker whale pillow before getting here and it was a perfect addition.

And nothing keeps me loving Kentucky anymore than a Kentucky tumbler and the UK game!

I got to attend to a fun event, Barndance! Lots of country music and a good time.

My outfits for going home were really poppin' with colors, am I right?!

I never realized how much I missed my bed from home until I got home and realized it was twice as big. I could sprawl out without falling off, which was pretty nice.

Ahh, Kentucky. Full of horse farms right around the corner, it's beautiful.

And I got to see my friends from high school, which was great of course!

My real best friend, though, is my sister.

Graeter's ice cream will always have my heart.

And being able to use the 'Lexington, Kentucky' at the top was sweeter than I thought it would be.

With a coffee in hand and curls in my hair, I was anxious to get back to Richmond. Flying by myself for the second time was actually pretty nice.

Like I said in this Insta post, this is how the majority of my outfits are looking. Bland, ugh.

But painting my nails makes me feel a little bit better.

When in doubt, ponytail it out. And make sure you have a fun scarf to accompany an otherwise boring outfit.

Thanks for listening to my rants,

1 comment:

  1. Girl, don't stress about how hard it is to leave your new home behind -- I totally get the feeling and everyone really does go through it! Just wait until you graduate ;) Good luck on finals!

    Makin' it with Marissa


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